The Ultimate Corporate Entrepreneur

Moving Beyond Setbacks: My 15-Day Rule

Unfortunately, I missed this year's Grace Hopper Conference where my role as participant and blogger would have been a different hat than the one I wore at last year's event as a workshop leader.

A senior technical leader reminded me of the 15-day rule that I shared during my talk on collaborative risktaking and how it had helped her move beyond setbacks this past year.

She thought it would be helpful for me to layout the process that I use--good idea!--so here it is.

 

My 15-Day Rule

Anyone who's been in business for any length of time has experienced setbacks, and if they say they haven't, they're either lying to you or aren't taking enough risks that make a big enough difference.

Years ago I developed my own plan for getting over setbacks--the kind that make you feel as if someone just punched you in the stomach.

I developed my own rule not because of the initial pain (although bad enough), but because I played it out in my head for days, weeks, and even months later. Internalizing setbacks makes us fearful and way too reluctant to move our lives forward and take risks again.

It doesn't matter how many days you spend on a particular step in the process, only that you learn to release and move on within a set timeframe--15 days works for me.

 

Days 1-3: Release

What to Do: Deal with the emotional side of disappointment and anger. Cry. Sleep in a fetal position for 12 hours straight. Watch sports or movies all day in your sweats or jammies. Eat your favorite food (yes, chocolate can be considered a meal). Use cuss words that you never (or rarely) use, just don't direct them at your local cafe barista. 

What not to Do: Go on Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn to voice or vent your anger. Try not to make a public display of your emotions. If you are a public figure, it may be difficult to not call a press conference to voice your side of the story. But try. We're only talking three days.

 

Days 4-5: Celebrate

List all the great things that you've contributed to something bigger than yourself; invite folks to share how you've transformed them, their relationships (supporting their dog through obedience training does count), their environment at work, or even their business or organization. 

Invite people to be creative in sharing their appreciation with you. Their thanks might come via email, video, audio, a blog post, a poem or a handwritten letter.

You might consider throwing a small, dinner party or a bigger, informal gathering where someone other than yourself cooks for the group.

 

Day 6: Pamper

Get the full 9-yards--whatever makes you feel and look good. A new haircut, 90-minute massage, facial, pedicure and manicure, a new shirt or blouse that makes your "eyes pop". Spend a half day at your favorite cafe reading a new book, breaking in your new Kindle, iPad, Nook or other electronic toy.

 

Days 7-10: Assess, Discover and Learn

You're now ready to take a step back and see the bigger picture of what worked, didn't work, and what you will do differently in future. Here are a few questions to get you started.

• What top 3 things--the heavy hitters--impacted the outcome?
• What could you have controlled but chose not to?
• Who could you have influenced but didn't?
• What risks did you not take that might have changed the outcome?
• What risks did you take that never felt right to you, i.e., forced?
• Did you ask for help too late or not enough times along the way?
• What were your missed opportunities along the way?
• What advice did you wrongly heed?
• What advice did you fail to heed but will in future?
• What heavy hitters were identified during your team's debrief?

 

Days 11-14: Refine Your Approach, Reinvent, and Rebrand

This is when you pull together what you've learned and refine your approach for future. You might want to consider tapping the expertise of mentors and coaches or an advisory board who will provide you with their perspectives.

This is when you decide whether it's time to reinvent and rebrand yourself within the next 3 or 6 months. Your decision will be driven by the outcomes of your self-assessment with that of your team and support network.

 

Day 15: Closure

Congratulations--you've reached the point of letting go of the past and moving towards your future. 

Make it a great one in 2012!

Resilience Tools for When Setbacks Happen

The holidays somehow make personal and professional setbacks feel all the more intense than at other times of the year.

Whether they come in the form of job loss (why do companies decide to "squeeze in" layoffs during the holidays?) or the loss of a loved one, we've all experienced setbacks at some time or other in our lives.

Even though a failed attempt at something you and/or your team cared passionately about doesn't come close to that of job loss (unless you lose your job because of it!) or the loss of someone we care about, rebounding from a setback still requires similar resilience tools.

My special guest this week for the last show of Coach for Innovation in 2007 is Mike Robbins, a man who knows a thing or two about bouncing back from personal and professional setbacks.

A former baseball Pro for the Kansas City Royals, Mike faced the end of his dream career as a pitcher following an injury. After working in sales and development for two Internet start-ups until the dot-com bubble burst, Mike found himself, once again, at the crossroads of facing the end of something.

He saw this career setback as an opportunity to figure out how he could make a living doing what he loves: motivating others.

Join us this Friday, December 21 at 3pm (Pacific), for a very special 30-minute segment When Setbacks Happen: How Do You Focus on the Good Stuff? and discover what resilience tools you need to have handy in your life toolbox for those times when things get tough.

Project Setbacks: Getting Back on Track

Setbacks are to projects as problems are to customer service—you know you’ll experience them at some point.

The good news is that people often remember the outcome and your grace under pressure when handling the problem. Your approach and problem-solving speed makes all the difference in getting back on track:

• Get a perspective of the problem
• Adapt to the situation
• Review your options
• Revise and get back on track

The first time I experienced a major project setback it hit me hard because I thought our bases were covered. Almost overnight, our project funding dried up as if by some voodoo magic.   

Known for my “plan B” project expertise this setback not only came as a surprise, but was a major embarrassment to me as well. While my energy and focus was intent on leading the team and solving daily operational problems, there was a subtle political shift happening that would negatively affect our multi-phased project. The unseen benefit for us came in the guise of four key lessons.

Decoding Business Ethics

I think Silicon Valley companies are in dire need of a decoder ring like the kind kids scramble to find in cereal boxes. 

Many of our local leaders appear to have lost their way. In recent days we’ve read about the stock option backdating debacle and the HP spying scandal that’s sure to stay in the spotlight thanks to Carly Fiorina’s tell-all book about the ‘good old boy’ network she fought against and a Board of Directors who exhibited less than emotionally intelligent behavior. 

But at some point we’re all faced with doing the right thing for the right reason, whether it’s personally or professionally. Sometimes the decision is more straightforward—is it legal or not?—but other times you could find yourself struggling with the ethical nuance of a decision.   

Four Under the Radar Workplace Opportunities

One person’s trash is another’s treasure.

Under the radar opportunities present themselves when we train our observation skills to see them and play to our strengths when acting on them. The good news is that you can benefit from the missed, ignored, or discarded experiences of others.

Observing what’s around you and what’s behind you can yield rich rewards down the road. The next time you want to fly under the radar screen consider the following four opportunities: 

• Political diplomat
• Turnaround artist
• Relationship handler
• Responsible risktaker

No Success Like Failure: Benefiting from Your Setbacks

Our local metropolitan newspaper wrote a rather scathing review about Cameron Crowe’s recent film, Elizabethtown, citing the director’s confusion about the type of film he really wanted to make. 

It got me thinking about Crowe’s creative risks and what benefits came out of this box office dud. Of course, when the financial stakes are this high, studio heads and viewers are less forgiving of risks that tank.

Managing creative risk is about scoping and prioritizing the risks associated with the project.  You can’t effectively fund and run a project until you know what your risks will cost – financially, politically, business, or career wise. 

Crowe got confused about the risk he really wanted to take. He squandered his energy, funds, and passion and wound up delivering a watered down version of his original vision.  He might have thought that making a film outside the proverbial studio box was the same as playing to the box office formula.

There’s a good lesson for business professionals in Crowe’s dilemma.